Jhogra

Boka shuni na shuni na kintu jokhon shuni shara duniyar shamne shunte hoy. OMG! Ki je rag lagtese. Ectually lachilo kintu now i've calmed down alhamdulillah. U c what happened 2day is... actually its my fault... ajke shokale ammu told me that chola ar dal pani diye bhijiye rakhte because we are having guests 4 iftar. So thats what I did. Niche giye shundor kore chola ar dal pani diye bhijiye rakhlam. Kintu, jei ammu niche gelo (a long time later, 2 hours before Iftar) the house filled with obscene language and swear words directed at me! U c, what I did was chola ar dal take ekta bati-te mishiye bhijiyechi. But as u might have guessed I should have done it separately. Ujbok, ahammok, k****r bacha, h***m**d*, .... and many more bangla gali galaj shunte holo. But alhamdulillah 1 thing I am good at it chup kore boka shuna. I can get yelled at for a whole day non-stop and i can be as silent as though I dont even exist.

So there I was, lokkhi meye hoye chup kore boka shunchilam. Then to my surprize, Ms. Doe and her sis came 2 my house 2 give me a visit (as it was my b-day yesterday). They brought all sorts of yummy foods (which we all enjoyed very much @ iftar 2nite - masha Allah her mum and her are both GREAT cooks ;). Kintu oi shomoi amar boka shunar peak hour chilo. Actually peak hour just pass korechilo but things were still heated. So u can imagine, guest er shamne amake emon bokata dilo. Ami ar ki korbo, lojjai mukhta lukiye rakhte holo. I'm really sorry Ms. Doe about what u had 2 c. Only if u stayed longer I could have explained all this 2 u. Anyways, this went on for an entire 2 hours! And I was quiet the whole time alhamdulillah. Not a word came out of my mouth except responses to questions. And maybe some tears that came out of my eyes. But I was glad because I didnt cry much! This is a HUGE accomplishment 4 me alhamdulillah, masha Allah, yay!

I've realised that I dont get yelled at by parents a lot but when i do I have a big audience. Once in front of Upoma and Ema I got yelled at big time for wanting to drive to Minto (even tho I have my license). Another time I got yelled at in front of over 15 girls at a sleepover (even tho it was over the telephone it was really embarassing). I even had big serious debates with abbu in front of other uncles at dawats! See, this stuff is like once in a blue moon 4 us but people must thing we are the most jhograte family alive! lol, oh yeah, i remember once in NZ at this cultural function, i was 8 yrs old and me sis was 4. We got into such a HUGE fight, all the performances had 2 b stopped (i think) and aunties and uncles had to come and stop us (i remember that my parents were SOOOOOOOO embarassed)!

I just pray that Allah amake maaf kore dei for being such a bad daughter. Abbu ammuke ami ragateo pari, lol. Coz everytime i was yelled at it was my fault (as far as i remember). Now i just need 2 be patient and continue with my anger management and improve on it as much as i can insha Allah ;)